Friends, I’m very excited to introduce a guest blogger who has made a significant impact on my own life through her wisdom and kindness: Dannielle, or as most call her, D, from the blog and podcast Be You & Thrive! I hope you are impacted by her message as much as I am… this is SO SO relevant to my own life right now. If you ever struggle to accept the circumstances of your life, or balance the loss of things no longer with hopes and anxieties for the future, this is for you, too.
Accept your life—Just as it is right now.
Embrace your life! Accept it—just as it is right now—so that those moments of happiness that you’re waiting for, don’t pass you by.
Without a doubt, I know that we have each struggled with accepting what our life may look like right now—none-the-less embracing it!
Oftentimes, I find myself waiting (and honestly striving!) for what’s next.
On average, there are two different reasons for not accepting or embracing life as it is right now:
- We are going through a difficulty and desire to move out of it.
- We desire something specific for our future that we want right now!
Truth is, we don’t just want ‘what’s next’ because we’re going through hardship, but we want ‘what’s next’ all the time! And we are human after all, but what are we missing by living in our past, or too far ahead in the future?
There is a quote that has spoken to me for years and fits in beautifully with this topic:
Honor the space between the no longer and the not yet. (Nancy Levin)
I think we’ve proven that this ‘space in between’ is often difficult to settle into. It’s a transitional time, no matter what our circumstance.
How do we begin to honor this ‘space in between? How do we accept life, just as it is, right now?
Two practices that teach us to how to honor where we are right now.
Freedom from past.
You may have recently gone through a difficulty and feel the desire to move past it. If you’re in the midst of healing from the ‘no longer’ aka your past circumstances, it can involve heartache, confusion and discomfort. It’s a shifting time when we have to let go of something that we perhaps once loved or still long for. Or maybe it’s something we want to forget or an experience that we regret.
When I think about those times in my life, they were hard to endure. They cause us to experience a mix of emotions: feelings of loss of what we thought our lives would be like, or what we wanted them to be like.
But because these things have already happened or are not going to happen, they are not a part of our ‘present moment.’
Our focus should be on practicing how to move forward, while allowing ourselves to grow from our past experiences.
…And I can’t emphasize that last thought enough: Move forward from your past, yet take growth with you from the experiences that you’ve had.
A friend once explained to me, that holding onto your past is like carrying around a backpack full of rocks. It weighs you down. It becomes a burden. And when I think of it that way, no wonder we desire to strive for our future vs. living in ‘the now’. We are tired of carrying ‘the no longer’ around.
Practice tool: Unzip your individual backpack and take inventory.
Is there something that you are carrying around from your past that you need to lay down in order to wholeheartedly live in your present?
Freedom from future.
On the flip side, some of us may unzip the backpack and raise our hands and say, “Nope! No rocks in here!” Perhaps we let past be past and took the growth onboard instead of the extra baggage.
But we may still find ourselves always striving for something else, due to a feeling of lack.
In my 20’s and 30’s I was devoted to detailing out my life. I had a habit of road-mapping every next step to strive toward my future—to a tee!
This characteristic of looking too far ahead can get confusing in regards to its meaning. When we refer back to, ‘Honoring the space between the no longer and the not yet,’ I don’t think this has anything to do with giving up the hopes, dreams or desires we have for our future. But I do think we get ahead of ourselves and rush for what’s next. We don’t savor all the good that can be found in our now and quite frankly, we may not be ready for what’s next.
We may need to learn more in our now, to prepare for our future.
In transitional seasons of my life, I’ve realized the benefit of sitting through them in order to take the available growth on board. When we sit, we are still. It’s a restful time, and a break from whatever we’re doing. When we begin to practice sitting through transitions, we are actually pressing the pause button from striving forward—and this allows us to intentionally be in the now and learn from our present moment.
Practice tool: Learn to sit with and through your circumstance.
What in your life, are you not taking full advantage to learn from right now? Are you savoring all the good from the experiences and relationships that can be found in your now?
There are so many benefits to living in our present moment.
These experiences (or gifts!) are essential and prepare your path toward your future.
Celebrate the now. Have confidence in your now. Trust your now. And realize the greatness within your now.
Xo Mwah! ~D
Be You and Thrive
As always, if you loved this post, reach out to D, show her some love, and give this post a share! For more Ivory & Pine, subscribe to The Ivories below!
About Dannielle Alphonse | Be You and Thrive
Dannielle ‘D’ is an enthusiast for life and has a wholehearted passion to inspire, offer hope, ignite bravery and be a catalyst for women toward living with greater intention. She shares that each of us are unique, have purpose and can experience a greater depth of freedom and joy.
Through her own life transitions, Be You and Thrive was developed as an authentic platform to share her story, knowledge and experiences. The Thrive Blog offers valuable resources and insightful writing contributions from women around the globe.
When not pursuing her passion for travel with her husband, you can find D at home in Chicago enjoying life with her dog Miss Sofia, nature, reading, writing, athleticism and all things creative.
Connect with D:
On the Thrive Blog
In the Podcast: The Practice of Living as we Intend
On Social Media: